So, apparently Leo DiCaprio who is 48 years old is having a relationship with a girl who is 19. This is being constantly talked about on twitter and on other social media platforms with people posting their “takes” on it, most of them condemning DiCaprio pointing out the inappropriateness and the “predatory” nature of the relationship or even it’s “pedophilic nature”. What do you guys think about it? It’s a pretty big age gap and I understand why some people are taking an issue with it. But do you have a problem with that? Do you think this type of relationship should be discouraged or even criminalized?
(Please do not understand this post as “gossip” or something like that, my intention is to address a larger discussion from that case which is being talked about a lot, which has to do with things that we have already discussed here sometimes)
In my opinion, once someone is old enough to have sex with people outside their age bracket (above the AoC), they should be old enough to understand and address the potentially problematic power dynamics that can emerge from age-gap relationships. Whether or not 18 (assuming that was the AoC in this case since people are upset about them being 19) is the right age for that, I don’t have the background knowledge to say, but as long as people are following AoC laws I don’t have an issue with age gaps
People need to mind their own business and let consenting adults do whatever consenting adults want to do!
Considering the popularity of barely legal porn, the attraction to 18 - 19 year olds is highly common. This guy just has the money and status to make such relationships a reality for him. At least his young bride will never have financial trouble.
As long as he wasn’t manipulating her prior to being of legal age… Why do these people care what two consenting adults do?
Really, the people freaking out over what others do tend to have the biggest skeletons in their closets.
I think so too, but it seems that sentiment towards this type of relationship tends to be quite negative especially in the US. It ends up being something seen as disgusting, and it is widely believed that a younger person would be “manipulated” in a relationship like that due to issues such as “power imbalance” etc, and a lot of people even argue that it is predatory and pedophilic as mentioned in my post. I believe that here in Latin America and in Europe, for example, it’s not seen as such a bad thing, although in the United States it really seems to be very frowned upon, at least that’s what I noticed from the US media reaction and also from the social media reaction, especially on twitter, perhaps one could argue that this does not reflect the overall sentiment of the americans, but it’s hard to believe that due to the fact that this outrage was widespread, with posts criticizing DiCaprio garnering massive amounts of “likes” and shares.
As I said, I do agree with you guys on that, although I believe there are legitimate debates to be had about power imbalances etc. However consenting adults should be able to have relationships with whoever they want, and I don’t think that freedom should be taken away from anyone, no matter how legitimate the age gap concerns may be.
Yeah, but a lot of this outrage is a giant Appeal to Disgust.
In America, it’s fairly common for people to be outraged by pretty much anything… Instead of dealing with the actual problems, which would require actual effort and commitment, these same people want to get online and complain about the lives of others because it’s easier, quicker and gets validation from the other randoms online. These people don’t want to handle the real issues, they just want to feel better about themselves and how morally superior they are.
Do I think there’s a discussion on power imbalance? Definitely, especially since his sheer wealth creates a massive imbalance even among other people his age.
Do I think it’s pedophilic? Unless he was trying to coax her into a relationship when she was a minor… No. IF he did that, then yeah, that’s a problem for obvious reasons and he would be a creeper if he did.
But to be honest, this is about a bunch of people hopping on a bandwagon because they need something or someone to hate. You have a rich person who is handsome, famous, looks good for his age and has the life a ton of people WISH they had… So they pick at him to feel better about themselves because they want what he has.
Same thing with people faulting Mr. Beast paying for blind people to get surgery… Famous guy, successful, tons of money, good looking, kind… They invent a reason to hate him.
… This is a fairly common thing in all honesty.
This whole thing is probably fueled by jealousy and disgust, but packaged as “reasonable” moral outrage. Instead of getting better, they want to try to drag these people down to their level of misery. Anyway, this probably isn’t really about the actor’s dating life, more he was an easy target for people to jump on… If it wasn’t him, it’d probably be someone else… It’s pretty much Cancel Culture in a nutshell.
I’ve gotta admit that I’ve some conflicting thoughts on this, but maybe not in the way others might? Lemme do some rambling about it;
So, it’s likely unsurprising (considering I’m on this forum), but my default position (w/o any additional context &/or red flags) on older people who prefer to (or even exclusively) date younger adults is…
It’s fine.
Yes, it’s true that many abusers intentionally prey upon newly legal adults for their vulnerability & lack of experience, & yes, there are times when even non-abusive older adults might accidentally harm their younger partners bc they aren’t meeting them at their level of experience & maturity – but the act of an older adult choosing to court younger adults is still not inherently dangerous just bc it could be!
… however.
While I find most of the people posting on Twitter & Tumblr about it… annoying at best (intentionally spreading anti-sex propaganda at worst) –
&, FWIW, I kiiinda doubt we wouldn’t’ve heard a lot more substantial allegations of DiCaprio behaving predatory by now if he’s actually, like, manipulating these girls (or w/e it is the bird app is fussing over) –
I… can’t help but consider the potential merit within critical discussion & analysis of this pattern on a much broader scale than just Leo.
- There are approx. 9 billion additional communication barriers & relationship pitfalls inherent to someone that powerful & wealthy primarily seeking out younger adults.
- On top of that, an important bit of context that further complicates the matter is just how many equally-powerful people in Hollywood + similar industries seem to have the exact same “tastes” as Leo, which IMO implies it’s become enough of a norm within that sphere that it becomes genuinely unlikely that every older, powerful partner in similar relationships are being mindful of those pitfalls, even if they’re not trying to harm their partner (& tho it’s not… ideal, the solution to that might very well come in the form of shifting cultural norms, possibly aided by the increased public attention to/criticism of the phenomenon).
… all of which is to say:
While I loathe the popular discourse on this topic for several reasons, I do somewhat reluctantly think it’s reasonable (or at least understandable) that some people are uniquely skeeved out by &/or overly critical of Leonardo DiCaprio’s dating habits – I just think it’s… mmm, misguided to attack one singular man for an ethical & moral dilemma that is significantly more complicated than his actions alone.
(… hopefully this wall of text isn’t too difficult to parse, lol sorry – also, I… haven’t actually read the other comments here yet bc I didn’t expect to spend so long writing, so extra apologies if someone else has already said something similar in a manner that’s more concise then, uh. All of This.)
Ruth 3. Ruth and Boaz.
Just saying.