The thing is, I don’t care what a lot of people think, and I don’t care about how things come off to others. You are literally telling this to a guy who faps to lolicon regularly. Of course, I don’t tell everyone this, but some of the people I have told have saod they don’t like it, and are uncomfortable, but still accept me. In the end, I will date someone for what they bring to me individually, not for how others perceive the relationship.
Like others here said, maturity is not a good way to go about deciding to date someone. I am immature in many ways, and I often find other 18 year olds have much more experience than me in some areas. Like others here said, age is an objective criterion, no subjectivity involved. Also, while 16-18 may or may not involve much difference in maturity in some cases, that’s honestly a case by case basis thing. Some 18 years olds have been around far more than I have, and thus may be ready to settle.
Yes, a lot of people with ADHD, autism, or other neurodivergencies would not be adults under that. Also people with borderline personality disorder, narcissism, etc. A lot of disorders make you immature in some ways, and make these people vulnerable to predators. Should people not date them?
An 18 year old is mature enough to make their own decisions, on average. Just because it often ends poorly does not mean it always does. Yes, often many guys have predatory intentions, but it’s a case by case matter. I know I wouldn’t coerce or take advantage of someone’s lack of experience. I just don’t have it in me.
Even if the age of consent was 14, or 10, or 8, or 0, I would not date any of them. I use 18 as a criterion because I believe that’s where a lot of people, on average, have enough experience and knowledge to make their own decisions.
You are pretty much admitting that maturity and experience and mentally has something to with determining consent and adulthood. You only use 18 as a criteria because today we consider that the age of adulthood, if we considered the age of adulthood 10 years old you also would defend that. Just because you wouldn’t do it that doesn’t mean that the majority doesn’t and the majority appears to predators. I have a lot of examples that I have experienced and not only that but the men and women who date younger people than also seem to be very emotionally stunt. For me, this is a pretty reasonable reason to judge people who date people much younger than them. If course, I don’t go out there hating and acting aggressive towards anyone who dates an 18 year old, but if you want my very honest opinion: Its almost always predatory and I do judge them. Being ilegal or not doesn’t make anything moral.
No, you are wrong. I would not date someone who is 10 even if it was legal. I would still use 18 as a criterion. Nowhere did I say that I use it just because it is the current standard. You made that up. All I said was that I use 18 as a criterion because most people are mature enough to make decisions. Yes, there can be different degrees of maturity, but it’s usually enough to take responsibility for your life. A 10 year old can in no way do that.
The majority appear to be predators? Thats just your opinion based on your limited understanding. Also. Since when is using consensus a good determinant as to what is good and bad? People used to think lower ages of consent were okay, but that didn’t make it right. So many people, women and men, could come forth and say it’s bad and predatory, but that does not make it true, just like saying the sky is red does not make it so, even if billions of people say that.
My dude, I am literally a nepiophile who has lots and lots of different fetishes which I ain’t gonna talk about here and I also use lolicon material often and I want to buy a doll on the future when I have money. I am much more looked down than you. Maturity is an actually really good way of measuring why to date someone, there’s a difference between being immatures on certain aspects and being completely immature in almost every contrast of the other person, not to mention power dinamics. 16-18 almost ALWAYS never differ on maturity. That’s why most people find it ok to an 18 and a 16 date each other. What should determine adulthood? If we are going to look for objective criteria for the age of adulthood, why should it be 18 and why it has to be 18? You personally not caring about how a stranger turns out after doing said thing doesn’t determine your personal morals. A bunch of things would be ok if we follow this standard. You really think I actually care to the point of hating them for it? Of course not, but if you ask me what I think of it I’m gonna be honest. And regarding the neurodivergent thing, I am also neurodivergent and yes, depending of the level of support I would also give side eyes and yeah, they also are often predatory and dangerous to us. For me, it would all depend of the level of support of the neurodivergent person and if the neurotypicals person is well educated on the matter or else it will cause lots of problems both for the neurotypical person and the neurodivergent. I am just explaining my point of view and why some people find big age gaps relationships wrong. It’s not necessarily jealousy from older women and turning it like that is the case is shallowing the issue.
I didn’t say you said that. I am just saying you think like that 18 year old are older enough to do date older people because you have been told since kindergarten that that’s the age you become an adult. If we were on like ancient Greece in which the age of consent was 14 year old or in another culture which people do child marriage you would also most likely think that the criteria would be 14 and that the 14 year old is old enough to be with an older person and to understand what is going on
Well that may be it. I grew up on a very small town in a rural area in Latino America country. I grew up with lots of examples of big age gap relationships, I have read stories on reddit about big age gap relationships and people who have dated people older than them. They almost always seem to be predatory or if not so the older person is very emotionally stunt. I had examples of my grandma, my sister, my friends and etc all my life. All of them failed. That’s just how I think.
Yeah I agree with that. But same could be sayed about dating a 18 year old, the vast majority people seem to think that’s ok at least among men and people on my country.