Hello, island.
First, I wish to extend my deepest empathy for your loneliness. The part about calling your dolls “surrogates” actually touched my heart. I know full well the idea that we can never be “fulfilled”. I have become (as Pink Floyd said it, “comfortably numb”) with this. I hate it when something comes up in my life when I feel that which I am usually numb to. Those are tough times.
I understand that these are not always about sex. My irritation came through with that comment. And yes, I’d rather see someone expressing their sexual pent-up feelings on an inanimate object rather than taking them out on a real child.
I understand (and even stated in my OP) that taking them away causes grief and throws people back into their miserable loneliness; which is why I criticized just snatching them away without considering the psychological implications. But you see, that “loneliness being filled”? I can’t see that it is; because, as I have stated repeatedly, its not real. Absolutely nothing can replace real human to human contact.
When I am upset enough, I turn to friends and family for support. I have MAP friends and I have understanding siblings I can turn to when it comes to my MAPness. Once, I fell so in LOVE with this 8 year old, and I grieved hard. One of my brothers pressured me into opening up and I was afraid to; normies tend to not understand what its like to fall in love with a child. He paused, sighed, thought it through, then said; “I don’t know what its like to be in love with a child, Incognito. But I do know what its like feel love that you can’t say and you have to bottle up. In my own ways, I’ve been there. I’m so sorry your going through this”. Broke me down; what a wonderful person to have in my life.
I hope that you can someday find other ways to fill your loneliness or mitigate it to a manageable level rather than depending so heavily on fantasy. Again, I have a heart, and it goes out to you.
The “fantasy” I visit once in a while include: Masturbation (quite frequently), Videos and pictures of little girls (dancing, gymnastics, or swimsuits), listening to pornhub (when I have trouble with sexual functioning, the sounds help), and occasionally, family nudist sites. They are listed in the order of use.
But I do not build fantasy relationships and instead, seek out real relationships with real people.
I extend my wishes for peace to you.